Self-hatred is an extreme criticism of oneself. It may feel as though everything you do is imperfect, and you are unworthy of possessing and achieving good things in your life. Whenever you let self-hatred thoughts take over yourself, you feel like someone is keeping an eye on your activities, and they will punish you or penalize you for all of your actions. Self-hatred thoughts also cause you to criticize and feel shameful about your existence.
Typically, due to self-hatred thoughts, you feel like:
● Unworthy.
● Loser.
● Unlikeable.
Possible Reasons of Developing Self-Hatred
You might develop a self-hatred image of yourself due to these reasons:
Childhood Trauma
Many people create a hated image of themselves because of some trauma that they face in childhood. The trauma could be of any form, such as sexual abuse, rigorous punishments or taunts, or anything of such extreme level.
When children experience anything not meant for their age, they start viewing the world as unsafe for living. To survive in such a dangerous world, they develop a narrative that makes them feel incompetent and unworthy of this world.
Such hateful narratives could be conveyed to them by any of their close ones, including parents. This is why I always suggest young parents avoid scolding their kids. Instead, they should try to explain things in a lovable manner.
If you ever feel like you are experiencing any issues due to childhood trauma, you must look for confidence counseling from a licensed professional counselor. This is one of the ways through which you could get over the self-hatred habit.
Expectations
Aspiring for something is good for your personal growth. It is because your aspirations define what you will become and achieve in your life. However, you must consider a line of separation between your wishes and your expectations. It is because whenever anything happens against our expectations, we tend to get hurt for that. Hence, your wishes and objectives should never contradict your expectations.
When you fail to fulfill your expectations, you feel sad about yourself. This also makes you doubt your capabilities and lead you to create a self-hatred image of yourself. This is why I always suggest to my clients not to expect anything from their actions. Instead, they should focus primarily on the process rather than looking for outcomes.
Pleasing Nature
Throughout my counseling career, I counseled a number of clients who hate themselves just because of their pleasing nature. It is good to help others and to put a smile on others' faces. However, if you ever try to please all in a single room, you will end up pleasing none.
It is a quality of humans to differ from others' narratives, meaning a thing that makes you feel good may not be good for the other person. This is why when you try to please all and fail to do so, you start doubting your capabilities. Whenever a professional counselor hosts a self-esteem counseling seminar, they might address clients' pleasing nature.
Perfectionism
Perfectionism is one of the prime causes that could lead you to grow a self-hatred image of yourself. Perfectionism in a nutshell is how you are wired. It doesn’t mean something is wrong with you, but how you grew up to perceive the world and environment around you. Due to a perfectionist mindset, you try to accomplish everything perfectly.
Having a perfectionist tendency is good for your personal growth. It is because this helps you enhance your capabilities. However, over perfectionism is dangerous for you, as you try to accomplish everything perfectly. And, if you fail to do so, you end up doubting your potential and feel incompetent about yourself.
Whenever you commit any mistake, you learn something new. This is why you would not want to hesitate to commit mistakes, as mistakes are a part of life. In contrast, you want to avoid repeating the same mistake again and again.
Self-Comparison
Comparison with others is one of the prime causes that might make you feel low about yourself. Due to your self-comparing tendency, you try to compare yourself with others. And whenever you find that other people are achieving great things in their lives and you are doing just nothing, you start hating yourself. Here, you need to understand one thing: You possess different characteristics than others.
All you need is your personality analysis. When you know who you are and what you are capable of, you can easily work for your life's objectives. Well, for identifying your true self, all you require is to follow methods described in self-actualization psychology.
How To Overcome Self-Hatred Thoughts?
Living a self-hatred life is overwhelming, exhausting, and isolating. Luckily, there are some healing self-hatred methods with which you can address this cause. These are as follows:
Control Your Inner Critic
If you struggle with self-hatred, you can address it with your consciousness. When you find that your inner critic is feeling relentless due to inner dialogue occurring in your mind, you should try to deviate your brain from that dialogue and focus on some artistic activities.
Identify Your Strengths
To overcome your self-hatred thoughts, you can work on identifying your strengths. This will help you deviate from engaging in unnecessary thoughts that lead you to hate yourself. If you are unable to find your thoughts on your own, you can look for an expert's assistance in the form of a confidence counseling session.
Develop a Habit Of Accepting Compliments
If you do not consider yourself worthy of anything, you will hesitate to take any compliments. Receiving compliments may even make you uncomfortable. Well, such things are common, and if you wish to overcome your self-hatred image, all you need is to become habituated to such things.
You can start by taking small steps; develop a habit of appreciating others. When you appreciate others, you present a good picture of yourself. This way, you also start accepting compliments and thus, believe in yourself.
Final Words
Remember, good things take time to give results. When you start working on a new habit, you feel incompetent to accomplish that during the initial stage. However, when you routinely take similar actions for yourself, you become habituated to that. The same thing applies to self-hatred. Initially, when you try to alter your thoughts with new patterns, you may find the task difficult but once you succeed in replacing your thoughts, you can turn your identity into a magnificent one.
To inform people about mental health struggles and their possible remedies, I Dr Gurpreet Kaur regularly posts mental health related content on Living Excellence Today. If you want to join this chain of awareness, get connected to me.
Typically, due to self-hatred thoughts, you feel like:
● Unworthy.
● Loser.
● Unlikeable.
Possible Reasons of Developing Self-Hatred
You might develop a self-hatred image of yourself due to these reasons:
Childhood Trauma
Many people create a hated image of themselves because of some trauma that they face in childhood. The trauma could be of any form, such as sexual abuse, rigorous punishments or taunts, or anything of such extreme level.
When children experience anything not meant for their age, they start viewing the world as unsafe for living. To survive in such a dangerous world, they develop a narrative that makes them feel incompetent and unworthy of this world.
Such hateful narratives could be conveyed to them by any of their close ones, including parents. This is why I always suggest young parents avoid scolding their kids. Instead, they should try to explain things in a lovable manner.
If you ever feel like you are experiencing any issues due to childhood trauma, you must look for confidence counseling from a licensed professional counselor. This is one of the ways through which you could get over the self-hatred habit.
Expectations
Aspiring for something is good for your personal growth. It is because your aspirations define what you will become and achieve in your life. However, you must consider a line of separation between your wishes and your expectations. It is because whenever anything happens against our expectations, we tend to get hurt for that. Hence, your wishes and objectives should never contradict your expectations.
When you fail to fulfill your expectations, you feel sad about yourself. This also makes you doubt your capabilities and lead you to create a self-hatred image of yourself. This is why I always suggest to my clients not to expect anything from their actions. Instead, they should focus primarily on the process rather than looking for outcomes.
Pleasing Nature
Throughout my counseling career, I counseled a number of clients who hate themselves just because of their pleasing nature. It is good to help others and to put a smile on others' faces. However, if you ever try to please all in a single room, you will end up pleasing none.
It is a quality of humans to differ from others' narratives, meaning a thing that makes you feel good may not be good for the other person. This is why when you try to please all and fail to do so, you start doubting your capabilities. Whenever a professional counselor hosts a self-esteem counseling seminar, they might address clients' pleasing nature.
Perfectionism
Perfectionism is one of the prime causes that could lead you to grow a self-hatred image of yourself. Perfectionism in a nutshell is how you are wired. It doesn’t mean something is wrong with you, but how you grew up to perceive the world and environment around you. Due to a perfectionist mindset, you try to accomplish everything perfectly.
Having a perfectionist tendency is good for your personal growth. It is because this helps you enhance your capabilities. However, over perfectionism is dangerous for you, as you try to accomplish everything perfectly. And, if you fail to do so, you end up doubting your potential and feel incompetent about yourself.
Whenever you commit any mistake, you learn something new. This is why you would not want to hesitate to commit mistakes, as mistakes are a part of life. In contrast, you want to avoid repeating the same mistake again and again.
Self-Comparison
Comparison with others is one of the prime causes that might make you feel low about yourself. Due to your self-comparing tendency, you try to compare yourself with others. And whenever you find that other people are achieving great things in their lives and you are doing just nothing, you start hating yourself. Here, you need to understand one thing: You possess different characteristics than others.
All you need is your personality analysis. When you know who you are and what you are capable of, you can easily work for your life's objectives. Well, for identifying your true self, all you require is to follow methods described in self-actualization psychology.
How To Overcome Self-Hatred Thoughts?
Living a self-hatred life is overwhelming, exhausting, and isolating. Luckily, there are some healing self-hatred methods with which you can address this cause. These are as follows:
Control Your Inner Critic
If you struggle with self-hatred, you can address it with your consciousness. When you find that your inner critic is feeling relentless due to inner dialogue occurring in your mind, you should try to deviate your brain from that dialogue and focus on some artistic activities.
Identify Your Strengths
To overcome your self-hatred thoughts, you can work on identifying your strengths. This will help you deviate from engaging in unnecessary thoughts that lead you to hate yourself. If you are unable to find your thoughts on your own, you can look for an expert's assistance in the form of a confidence counseling session.
Develop a Habit Of Accepting Compliments
If you do not consider yourself worthy of anything, you will hesitate to take any compliments. Receiving compliments may even make you uncomfortable. Well, such things are common, and if you wish to overcome your self-hatred image, all you need is to become habituated to such things.
You can start by taking small steps; develop a habit of appreciating others. When you appreciate others, you present a good picture of yourself. This way, you also start accepting compliments and thus, believe in yourself.
Final Words
Remember, good things take time to give results. When you start working on a new habit, you feel incompetent to accomplish that during the initial stage. However, when you routinely take similar actions for yourself, you become habituated to that. The same thing applies to self-hatred. Initially, when you try to alter your thoughts with new patterns, you may find the task difficult but once you succeed in replacing your thoughts, you can turn your identity into a magnificent one.
To inform people about mental health struggles and their possible remedies, I Dr Gurpreet Kaur regularly posts mental health related content on Living Excellence Today. If you want to join this chain of awareness, get connected to me.
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